After work last night, I ran a few errands on my way home. I fetched some dry-cleaning. I bought toilet paper. My greatest reason for wanting to buy a house is so that I can fill a closet with TP. I bought new batteries for my electric toothbrush. There is nothing sadder than an electric tooth brush running out of juice. I also picked up some groceries and a prostitute. …
They have idiots on the West Coast, too.
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RIDDLE OF THE WEEK:
There are three words in the English language that begin with “dw”. What are they? Derivations and plurals don’t count.
Answer to
last week’s: Always switch. The odds are 2/3 to 1/3, switching to not switching. If you don’t believe, do a search to find explanations.
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SOTD:
Toronto Ghost Signs
This is a Rutger’s tailgate. On Saturday, I took the NJ Transit out to New Brunswick to see Rutgers play Virginia Tech and to tailgate with some friends. The Rutgers fans aren’t too into to football, I guess. Neither are the players really. Here’s a whole page of photos of the kids at the game. …
SOTD: The Harlem Animal Farm
Erik and I commuted through Bryant Park last night and passed an art installation that consisted of rows of cubic metal cages, each filled with antique typewriters. Weird. …
I’m currently brainstorming on ideas for a halloween costume. Suggestions are welcome. Other years’ included Joey Buttafucco, Dr. Kevorkian, Marv Albert, Garth Maul, and Dead Regis. Bonus points if you can think of a costume that combines being a pirate with lasers.
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SOTD: At the party, I may fall down the stairs.
Erik and I commuted through Bryant Park last night and passed an art installation that consisted of rows of cubic metal cages, each filled with antique typewriters. Weird.
…
I’m currently brainstorming on ideas for a halloween costume. Suggestions are welcome. Other years’ included Joey Buttafucco, Dr. Kevorkian, Marv Albert, Garth Maul, and Dead Regis. Bonus points if you can think of a costume that combines being a pirate with lasers.
…
SOTD: At the party, I may fall down the stairs.
Nextel, similar to M-Life, launched a coy ad campaign, papering the city with bright yellow billboards that said, “Do”. Eventually, the ads were updated to look like the ones pictured above. Because of this marketing ploy, I’ve had to walk by a mile of nasty-ass yellow every g**damn morning. Please join me in my boycott of what ever freaking worthless service it turns out to be. …
This one is pretty famous.
RIDDLE OF THE WEEK:
The Famous Let’s Make a Deal Question
- You are on the “Let’s Make a Deal Show”.
- Monty Hall shows you 3 curtains and tells you that there is a brand-new car behind 1 of the curtains.
- He asks you to choose a curtain.
- After much deliberation you choose 1 of them.
- Monty then opens one of the 2 curtains you did not choose and shows you that it is empty. He always opens an empty one because he knows where the car is.
- He then turns to you and asks if you would like to switch from the curtain you chose to the other closed curtain
What should your response be?
Answer to last week’s: The boy bought a box that was 6′ by 3″ and put the rod in it diagonally.
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SOTD: Limbaugh is gone.
A New Book I’m Writing
Chapter 1
Eh, not so much. We don’t really get a long.
Chapter 2
Whoa. I think I’m in love.
Chapter 3
“I’ll stand by you,” said the girl.
Chapter 4
Lying.
Chapter 5
Cheating.
Chapter 6
Stealing.
…
Here’s Tuesday’s Word of the Week:
louche adj. Of questionable taste or morality: a louche night club; a louche painting.
Use it in a sentence today!
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SOTD: Trillian is the best IM client.
A New Book I’m Writing
Chapter 1
Eh, not so much. We don’t really get a long.
Chapter 2
Whoa. I think I’m in love.
Chapter 3
“I’ll stand by you,” said the girl.
Chapter 4
Lying.
Chapter 5
Cheating.
Chapter 6
Stealing.
…
Here’s Tuesday’s Word of the Week:
louche adj. Of questionable taste or morality: a louche night club; a louche painting.
Use it in a sentence today!
…
SOTD: Trillian is the best IM client.
It was a fine weekend, but I didn’t feel like lugging the camera around, so there are no pictures. Matt had a better weekend fishing and sent me a shot of this thirty pound striper he caught. …
I’ve tried crack and heroine, but they were dead ends. Nothing can compare or compete with my addiction to the “Snooze” button. Just kidding about the crack, Mom.
…
Last week I ripped on “The Rundown” while Ben raved. He reports this:
“The Rock runs down box office lead
LOS ANGELES, California (AP) — The Rock smacked down the competition with his action comedy “The Rundown,” which debuted as the weekend’s top movie by earning $18.5 million.”
I still stand by my former statement that the movie sucked. Financial success is a product of marketing, not quality.
…
Happy Birthday to EriCa.
…
SOTD: Maybe STC.com needs an editor.
It was a fine weekend, but I didn’t feel like lugging the camera around, so there are no pictures. Matt had a better weekend fishing and sent me a shot of this thirty pound striper he caught.
…
I’ve tried crack and heroine, but they were dead ends. Nothing can compare or compete with my addiction to the “Snooze” button. Just kidding about the crack, Mom.
…
Last week I ripped on “The Rundown” while Ben raved. He reports this:
“The Rock runs down box office lead
LOS ANGELES, California (AP) — The Rock smacked down the competition with his action comedy “The Rundown,” which debuted as the weekend’s top movie by earning $18.5 million.”
I still stand by my former statement that the movie sucked. Financial success is a product of marketing, not quality.
…
Happy Birthday to EriCa.
…
SOTD: Maybe STC.com needs an editor.
As a team building exercise, my company rewarded its employees with a sunset cruise around the harbor. I saw the statue from the closest I have ever been, but took no picture. I must say, though, that I do believe I had more fun than anyone. …
Sleep.
…
SOTD: Work on your accent, via TMN
As a team building exercise, my company rewarded its employees with a sunset cruise around the harbor. I saw the statue from the closest I have ever been, but took no picture. I must say, though, that I do believe I had more fun than anyone.
…
Sleep.
…
SOTD: Work on your accent, via TMN
Due to a gift from Susan of a pair of free passes, my evening began with a trip uptown with Ben to see a sneak preview of “The Rundown”, starring The Rock. Here’s the rundown on “The Rundown”; wait for it to be on Spike TV. The action scenes are good, and there is a five second cameo where Schwarzenegger passes the reins to Rock, but the plot is old-man-hair thin. All details, character development, and passing nods at reality are bypassed to allow for massive wrestling scenes. Ben loved it. …
After the movie, I joined Tricia and our friend Steve Kaul to see Built to Spill. Steve works with the band and procured us backstage passes.
Just a few details:
– Tricia knows everyone that works at Irving Plaza, which allowed me to keep my bag.
– Being over 21 and allowed backstage is infinitely better than not.
– Doug played the old stuff, including “Stab”, “Untrustable”, and a half-time “Joyride”. Closer was a twenty-three minute reggae jam of “Cortez the Killer”. Encore was “White Man in Hammersmith’s” with the singer from The Delusion singing Mick Jones’ bit.
– Standing by the sound board beside Phil Ek, producer of many amazing albums including The Shins’, is the best place to watch a show.
Thanks Susan, Trish, and Steve!
…
SOTD: Nobody hates Bush Moore.
Due to a gift from Susan of a pair of free passes, my evening began with a trip uptown with Ben to see a sneak preview of “The Rundown”, starring The Rock. Here’s the rundown on “The Rundown”; wait for it to be on Spike TV. The action scenes are good, and there is a five second cameo where Schwarzenegger passes the reins to Rock, but the plot is old-man-hair thin. All details, character development, and passing nods at reality are bypassed to allow for massive wrestling scenes. Ben loved it.
…
After the movie, I joined Tricia and our friend Steve Kaul to see Built to Spill. Steve works with the band and procured us backstage passes.
Just a few details:
– Tricia knows everyone that works at Irving Plaza, which allowed me to keep my bag.
– Being over 21 and allowed backstage is infinitely better than not.
– Doug played the old stuff, including “Stab”, “Untrustable”, and a half-time “Joyride”. Closer was a twenty-three minute reggae jam of “Cortez the Killer”. Encore was “White Man in Hammersmith’s” with the singer from The Delusion singing Mick Jones’ bit.
– Standing by the sound board beside Phil Ek, producer of many amazing albums including The Shins’, is the best place to watch a show.
Thanks Susan, Trish, and Steve!
…
SOTD: Nobody hates Bush Moore.
Three bright young democrats discuss the state of the nation at Croxley. Many good ideas were proffered and then ratified. Unfortunately, sleeping drunk on the street hindered any promulgation of our wisdom. …
Comedy consists of a marriage between content and timing. The internet, as opposed to books, provides the pop-up window, which I feel has a good comedic rhythm.
…
I’m really into the new HBO series Carnival. Ever since Oh Brother! Where art Thou, I’ve been fascinated by the dust bowl era. For this new show I’m reading The Grapes of Wrath and the Bible back to back. From what I hear, neither as a happy ending.
…
RIDDLE OF THE WEEK:
A boy goes and buys a fishing pole that is 6′ 3″ long. As he goes to get on the bus, the bus driver tells him that he can’t take anything on the bus longer than 6′. The boy goes back to town, buys one more thing, and the bus driver allows him on the bus. What did he buy, and what did he do with it?
Answer to
last week’s: The water level goes down. In the boat the brick must displace its mass in water because it is floating. Once it sinks, it displaces its volume which is less because the brick is denser than water.
…
SOTD:
Read a banned book this week.
It’s really true. I just don’t know what to believe anymore. …
Do you set your alarm clock ahead ten minutes to help your punctuality? And then do you sleep an extra ten minutes because you know that clock is fast? My whole adult life I had the clock radio set ten minutes fast and then one day I thought I’d grow up and just set it correctly. I thought I could will myself into being on time. I have been an extra ten minutes late to everything ever since.
…
I’m starting a new writing workshop next week so I’m canvassing for ideas. Please send me your thoughts. I’m looking for anything topical and under reported. Like Bennifer’s break up.
…
SOTD: My next home improvement is not track lighting.
